the dark will make a home for you....

Foggy bridge by Evgen Andruschenko on 500px.com

Sometimes it takes darkness and the sweet confinement of your aloneness to learn anything or anyone that does not bring you alive is too small for you.

~ David Whyte

Spring is reluctant - like a recalcitrant child, dragging her feet, leaning back against the hand that seeks to pull her along. Mood and energy levels rise and fall with the temperatures, the only consistency being the inconsistency.

I scribble in notebooks and sigh at the stack of letters to be answered, the idea of simply sitting upright at my desk seems too much and anyway, I don't want to write from the shadows.

So I tidy my desk and purge myself of the detritus of old dreams - smiling wistfully at the person I was and hoped to be, knowing now that it was always going to be me fighting against myself, forcing myself - again - into someone elses template.

Beauty is the one constant - the search for, the acknowledgement of; there is the chest-expanding inhale of wonder at the vivid blue of a jay's feathers and the soul-deep contentment of my fingers buried in the soil.

That's enough,then, to be going on with; for Beauty is no small practice, She requires more than occasional lip-service.

So while the world gathers speed and the lights strobe and flash, I'll light a candle and inhale the scent of wild violets and apple blossom. I will remember that this beautiful life of mine, though small and unassuming, ripples outward with intention of immense love and kindness.

Yes, that is enough.

~m. xo